It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Rumble strips road head = magical
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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