I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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