To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Randomize
