Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
