he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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