Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
