Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
