i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
