Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
