Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
