i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
