so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
