So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
