you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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