I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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