Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
