Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
