once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
You were trust falling into bushes
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