Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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