The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
