You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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