Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
