you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I woke up under a house in Key West
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
