New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
