You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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