Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
