fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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