Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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