Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
