Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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