If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
