She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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