i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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