Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
