that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
