you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
