MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
