Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize
