I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
