Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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