I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
