your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize