and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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