I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
