So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
