Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
