They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
