He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I am midnight drunk by noon
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
My vagina is officially offended.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
