you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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