No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
